Archive for May, 2012

Odo Nnyew Fie Kwan: love never loses its way home; power of love
one of the Adinkra symbols; Ghanaian fabric made from plain or dyed cotton with a design of religious or philosophical symbols.

if you was able to find,

someone, loves you and don’t mind,

to you he wants to bind.

so you are no more alone in your ride,

cause, you have found your life’s other side,

and, to happiness you found your guide.

Love is not a feeling, it is a state or lifestyle we live and experience; this is what I have learnt out of my few years of love and the stories and tales I have always been subjected to listen to from friends or through books.
Through last years I loved few girls, the shortest relation was for 2 days and the longest relation is more than 2 years now, and counting hopefully for lifelong!
You may fall in love with someone you never have seen – online dating! – or another one you have just met on a trip or travel.
Notice we usually refer to love as a place we fall into; we do materialise love to be able to understand it, and that is what I am trying to do here! Note I am not talking particularly about love between man and woman. Love is a lifestyle we take involving many things around; people, stuff or whatever. Like any other state or lifestyle it needs will, practice and environment or medium. You should what it takes prepares the soil and always water and take care of your plant.
Am I destroying the romance about it? On the contrary; people linked romance to love, for me, romance is the good part of love, why should I enjoy the misery and sadness in name of romance? People did that just to give reasons to their failure to realise love and contain its power! They witnessed break ups loneliness and fights, they could only live them by convincing themselves they are inevitable in name of romance; a romantic movie should picture sadness and misery!!
Feelings that form the main part of the equation of love are:

Attraction
Men and women have their own composition of atoms, characters and shapes; all forming electrodes resembling the ones in magnets, each magnet can attract many objects but there are always those perfectly matching magnets, leaving no spaces between them!
Who made that magnet can produce as many as he wants of its matches – a fact many people do forget just to build their own misery later on –

Loneliness
A primitive feeling all creatures have when left alone or separated from their stuff, tribe or flock! We usually feel like missing people to be around, and that depends on our needs! Some will still feel lonely even in the middle of a crowded party with their best friends! A child will be missing his Brocken toy or dead pet, some people will say it is out of habit or being used to be with those people, so when they leave we feel like we have some part of our life missing. But for me it is more about the memories and moments we lived together or expected to live; like missing the 6 o’clock tea conversation with the now travelling father!

Dependence
Like drugs introduced to our bodies replacing the naturally produced ones, letting the body be dependent on them. People habits and stuff introduced in our lives can cause our dependence on their presence; we all need support, encouragement and help even the slightest; having someone or something that is there always giving the feeling of security and confidence – sleeping by your friend teddy bear -.

Protection
A primitive feeling towards our belongings; you can witness a cat protecting its ball of fur, or mother caring for her kids. Jealousy is a wild form of protection mixed with a bit of selfishness and insecurity, it is graded from a mild degree of showing care and protection – in many cases, you can hear people talking how they feel that kind of jealousy from their partner -, to unbearable restrictions or envy!

So love is the state or relation with someone or something we are attracted to, depend on, feels lonely without and would protect whatever it takes!
All of that should be happening in a permitting and hostile medium of families, society, traditions and cultures. This medium affects the legitimacy of love but can’t kill it! We are the ones who have the exclusive ability to kill our love and sometimes we do unconsciously!
Love has no end, cause memories can’t be erased, they are stored back in our minds and are recalled randomly for example when listening to a song you first danced to!
What ends here is the feelings or better to say they are altered in a way that resembles changing poles of the magnet causing repelling magnets that it have always been attracting!
It is really important to know what you are going through, to know how you can adapt or even find your way to get out one day!
Through this small manual based on purely personal experience, I am trying to help to let everybody get in touch with the real power of love, dealing with such power with knowledge and right techniques can help you survive and get all its vast benefits just like nuclear power scientists!
In next chapters, we will know, how to know you are in love, how to keep the fire, how to overcome love!

Mahdi
24-5-2012
p.s. this manual is meant to help people to understand and wisely use the power of love, don’t use it to deceive or destroy someone!
p.s. it is based on personal experience not real scientific studies, and I am open for discussions.