Night thoughts 26/6/2010

Posted: February 15, 2017 in the chapters
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“I am dying to sleep!”

After a long exhausting day, all I would need is to reach my room and throw my body into my dear bed, wishing I can sleep all the next day, but I can’t!

The moment I touch the lovely, comfortable, and relaxing set called bed, he gets hyperactive, may he just can’t take over my brain all the day; when I am awake and conscious enough to stop him, so here comes his chance; when I let my head on the pillow he comes to take it over.

Don’t know how he can remember what that guy told me a few days ago, then he starts to plan for next day’s meeting, then back to how silly was my reaction over that friend’s jokes! He is evaluating the past, monitoring the present and planning for the future. That can be helpful.

I have tried yoga workouts, drinking milk, listening to soft music, reading, counting sheep and even vigorous physical workouts, trying to exhaust him as he does to me, but nothing could work with my wise man that may be helpful with yours.

I usually wake up not remembering when he was tired of such brain activities, that he surrendered to rest in the peaceful state of sleep, or rather say lie unconscious after sending every single neuronal message, and depleting the last transmitter in my brain neurons, that justifies my theory about why I don’t dream lately, I didn’t dream much since I had the wise man with me!

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No one can miss how a medical student should look like, we can recognise them in almost all movies wearing glasses – thick ones most times – don’t care how they look like and definitely don’t have the social life and relations normal people do.

But actually after being through the college I discovered another group, besides those guys who can give the nerdy look to the whole place, there are others; the cool, that is how they think they are when having fun all the time, playing and hanging out, turning the college into a social club by daytime to gather.

And there is the neutral group the coolly-nerd, or the nerdy-cool. They are who could have the recipe to cross their way through the difficult study and huge stressors, and to belong to this group was the wise’s choice…..

It takes little time management skills to schedule your lessons by your hobbies and free times. And it is never late to learn those skills because they are there inside each of us just needs to be turned on.

New life 10/1/2010

Posted: February 15, 2017 in the chapters
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“If you’re brave enough to say goodbye, life will reward you with a new hello.”― Paulo Coelho

 

Now we are free, that is how university students think in their first days, After all those years in school.

And yeah that was exactly what I said to myself, moving away from my family to live near the university…

Some people say that it requires talents to be a people magnet, but according to a book I have read recently; “How to be a people magnet” by Leil Lowndes: everybody can do so, it only goes easier if you have a good compilations of characteristics for it, and this was my case.

I adapted easily for my surprise, but the wise man and Mr Yousef were there smiling as if they knew it.

I got socially involved with almost everyone on different levels, and the wise man was delighted meeting other foreign men – everyone has his own thoughts and way of thinking even sharing the same culture as you do- he met the conservative and the liberal, the superficial and the deep. That eventually he formed his own views and norms those I hold as values till now.

In one year I was living another life; new place, new friends, and a newly adapted self!

Odo Nnyew Fie Kwan: love never loses its way home; power of love
one of the Adinkra symbols; Ghanaian fabric made from plain or dyed cotton with a design of religious or philosophical symbols.

if you was able to find,

someone, loves you and don’t mind,

to you he wants to bind.

so you are no more alone in your ride,

cause, you have found your life’s other side,

and, to happiness you found your guide.

Love is not a feeling, it is a state or lifestyle we live and experience; this is what I have learnt out of my few years of love and the stories and tales I have always been subjected to listen to from friends or through books.
Through last years I loved few girls, the shortest relation was for 2 days and the longest relation is more than 2 years now, and counting hopefully for lifelong!
You may fall in love with someone you never have seen – online dating! – or another one you have just met on a trip or travel.
Notice we usually refer to love as a place we fall into; we do materialise love to be able to understand it, and that is what I am trying to do here! Note I am not talking particularly about love between man and woman. Love is a lifestyle we take involving many things around; people, stuff or whatever. Like any other state or lifestyle it needs will, practice and environment or medium. You should what it takes prepares the soil and always water and take care of your plant.
Am I destroying the romance about it? On the contrary; people linked romance to love, for me, romance is the good part of love, why should I enjoy the misery and sadness in name of romance? People did that just to give reasons to their failure to realise love and contain its power! They witnessed break ups loneliness and fights, they could only live them by convincing themselves they are inevitable in name of romance; a romantic movie should picture sadness and misery!!
Feelings that form the main part of the equation of love are:

Attraction
Men and women have their own composition of atoms, characters and shapes; all forming electrodes resembling the ones in magnets, each magnet can attract many objects but there are always those perfectly matching magnets, leaving no spaces between them!
Who made that magnet can produce as many as he wants of its matches – a fact many people do forget just to build their own misery later on –

Loneliness
A primitive feeling all creatures have when left alone or separated from their stuff, tribe or flock! We usually feel like missing people to be around, and that depends on our needs! Some will still feel lonely even in the middle of a crowded party with their best friends! A child will be missing his Brocken toy or dead pet, some people will say it is out of habit or being used to be with those people, so when they leave we feel like we have some part of our life missing. But for me it is more about the memories and moments we lived together or expected to live; like missing the 6 o’clock tea conversation with the now travelling father!

Dependence
Like drugs introduced to our bodies replacing the naturally produced ones, letting the body be dependent on them. People habits and stuff introduced in our lives can cause our dependence on their presence; we all need support, encouragement and help even the slightest; having someone or something that is there always giving the feeling of security and confidence – sleeping by your friend teddy bear -.

Protection
A primitive feeling towards our belongings; you can witness a cat protecting its ball of fur, or mother caring for her kids. Jealousy is a wild form of protection mixed with a bit of selfishness and insecurity, it is graded from a mild degree of showing care and protection – in many cases, you can hear people talking how they feel that kind of jealousy from their partner -, to unbearable restrictions or envy!

So love is the state or relation with someone or something we are attracted to, depend on, feels lonely without and would protect whatever it takes!
All of that should be happening in a permitting and hostile medium of families, society, traditions and cultures. This medium affects the legitimacy of love but can’t kill it! We are the ones who have the exclusive ability to kill our love and sometimes we do unconsciously!
Love has no end, cause memories can’t be erased, they are stored back in our minds and are recalled randomly for example when listening to a song you first danced to!
What ends here is the feelings or better to say they are altered in a way that resembles changing poles of the magnet causing repelling magnets that it have always been attracting!
It is really important to know what you are going through, to know how you can adapt or even find your way to get out one day!
Through this small manual based on purely personal experience, I am trying to help to let everybody get in touch with the real power of love, dealing with such power with knowledge and right techniques can help you survive and get all its vast benefits just like nuclear power scientists!
In next chapters, we will know, how to know you are in love, how to keep the fire, how to overcome love!

Mahdi
24-5-2012
p.s. this manual is meant to help people to understand and wisely use the power of love, don’t use it to deceive or destroy someone!
p.s. it is based on personal experience not real scientific studies, and I am open for discussions.

Ghana on the run 1 of 5

Posted: March 16, 2012 in Travels

Ghana on the run – Cross Ghana Budget tour in 5 days – 1st day

After spending all 6 days of general assembly of IFMSA; the International federation of medical students’ associations in Accra between Erata hotel – our accommodation –, Mensvic hotel – the event venue -, DNR Turkish restaurant, and Accra Mall, we discovered that we didn’t see any of Ghana yet!

Accra from above - all what we have seen for the first 6 days in Accra!

We started by paying a visit to the Egyptian embassy in Accra where we met Mr Wael our consul there; a really cooperative and friendly  25 years young man who seems to love Ghana. He gave us some advices about places to go and some contacts. Also he advised us not to go to Tamale and Mole Game park as it is more 12 hours drive from Accra and it is not that rich of wild life just some animals they brought to live there! So we cancelled it from our planes to spend more time in cape coast and Volta region.

This tour was made true with help of Fatima – sister of a friend of mine on couchsurfing.org – she is an active young Ghanaian who spent the whole tour with us.

So from now on it is 3 of us Hussein, Nora and me, plus Fatima our guide.

1st day; Friday 9th of march 2012

9:00 am: Fatima passed by us in Erata hotel -http://www.eratahotel.com/-, then we went to Mensvic hotel to bring Mona who spent that day with us till her flight afternoon. we moved our luggage and checked in budget hotel near down town, in Canda neighborhood; club 10 hotel -http://club10accra.com/-.

last day in Erata hotel before leaving to club 10

1:00 pm: we took taxi to the national museum; where we got great introduction to Ghana culture and traditions and that gave us clues to all next days even in buying souvenirs and clothes.

“MM 2012 participants will relate, Ghanaian youth leader carrying a flag and leading people during wars or festivals – from the opening ceremony –“

Notes I still remember:

-they have that colorful special cloth and each pattern does mean or tell something.

- they used to stamp their clothes with Adinkra symbols that had meanings to them

– how tribes live and their common traditions, tools and dances.

– the story of slavery and St. George Castel in cape coast.

Dance of the Agbadza

Some common Adinkra symbols

Then we had a 20 minutes’ walk to kwame Nkrumah memorial park;

Nkrumah was Ghana’s prime minster who announced their independence from Great Britain in March 1957. And he was married to an Egyptian woman Mrs Fathia Nkrumah.

Nkrumah Grave

Note the ladder of death Adinkra symbol; resembling mortality

 5 pm: we went to Accra mall where we met the rest of IFMSA-Egypt delegation and had launch in Pizza Inn. Then we were divided; hussein went with others to Mensvic and we went with Fatima to Ashanti gold FC camp to meet some of her friends there – they had match in Ghana premier league next day and they 1 to 0 against Almighty Giants FC –

Then we returned to club 10 and spent the night; the rooms are fairly clean with good service but there were a cockroach in girls’ room wash room.

Notes about Ghana:

  • People are really friendly and taxi drivers are into casual chats just like Egyptian ones.
  • You should try grilled and chips bananas, fresh pineapple juice and the cola fruit.
  • Always negotiate whatever price you get with taxi or sellers, sometimes you can reach a less than 50% deal!!
  • Always move with your water, the water bags do taste strange! They are clean though.
  • Official language is English, so it is easy most of time to communicate with people, listen to radio and news and read road signs. Other language they use is Akan and Hausa – people use them sometimes in their personal life and discussions.
  • Currency is Ghanaian Cidi; 1 USD = 1.65 GhC
  • Tro-Tro is their public transportation; the microbus.

A new Year has come

Posted: December 30, 2011 in thoughts

“Years are just bigger scales of time; a whole year can be summarized in one second of success, What counts is what we do and what we stand for.” said the wise man.

2011 was one of my best; felt proud fighting for a cause and defending freedom of my country, spent most days with my beloved friends, Initiated my own small business that I love, started my NGO with some friends and most ever got engaged the most awesome girl I ever met.

Make this year a special one; live it like you never did before.

Wish Allah in 2012 to bring the best for all of my friends, and bless Egypt with peace and freedom.

M. Elmahdi

30/12/2011

القاء الاتهامات بدون توافر الحقائق والمعلومات الكاملة يعتبر جريمة في حق المجتمع والناس اللي بنستغل عدم معرفتهم

بيجيلهم دعم من برة؟ طب كويس!!!

عارف ليه أنا لما أعرف إن جمعية أو مركز حقوقي حصل على منح أو دعم خارجي؟

أنا بقالي 4 سنوات أعمل في جمعيات أهلية وحركات شبابية تنموية، أردت أشارك خبرتي في موضوع المنح الخارجية اللي أصبحت اتهام موجه لتشويه أي جهة معارضة!

في البداية أحب أوضح الفرق بين المشروعات الخيرية والتنموية، دائما نشبهه بالفرق بين تقديم سمكة إلى شخص محتاج أو إعطاؤه صنارة وتعليمه الصيد.

ودي ثقافة وطريقة تفكير لم نهتم بها غير مؤخرا، ويظهر ذلك واضحا في كمية التبرعات الموجهة للجمعيات الخيرية في مصر على سبيل المثال لرعاية الأيتام أو لتوزيع شنط رمضان! – أنا لا أقلل من مثل هذه المشروعات اللي المجتمع عندنا في أمس الحاجة لها. لكن اهتمامنا بالمشاريع الخيرية جاء على حساب الاهتمام بالتنمية. لذلك نجد أغلبية المشروعات التنموية قائمة على جهات مانحة أكثرها خارجية.

تقريبا كل الجمعيات – اللي أعرفها أو عملت معها – أهم المشكلات اللي تواجهها؛ الحصول على تمويل كافي لإقامة مشروعاتها. لذلك يعتبر الكثيرون في هذه الجمعيات الحصول على منحة أو دعم من جهات مانحة خارجية من أهم انجازاتهم!

لكي تدرك كيف يعتبر ذلك انجازا، سأحاول شرح كيفية التقدم والحصول على هذه المنح:

  • يقوم منسق المشروع بإعداد دراسة عن المشكلة التي يستهدفها ليتمكن من كتابة دراسة جدوى لمشروعه لحل ومواجهة هذه المشكلة ويجب إن يشرح أهداف المشروع ونتائجه المتوقعة وخطوات التنفيذ وآليات المتابعة والتقييم.
  • يتم البحث عن جهة مانحة تهتم بالمجال الخاص بالمشروع وتتوافق رؤيتها مع أهداف المشروع، ويرسل إليها طلب المنحة الذي قد يختلف من جهة إلى أخرى. – أمثلة لبعض الجهات المانحة: يمنك زيارة مواقعها الالكترونية للتحقق من أهدافها مراجعة تقارير مشاريعهم السابقة http://egypt.usaid.gov/en/Pages/default.aspx , http://www.fordfound.org /, http://www.gatesfoundation.org/ , http://www.theglobalfund.org/en/
  • يجب أن يكون المشروع قوي ليستطيع المنافسة مع آلاف المشاريع التي تستقبلها مثل هذه الجهات
  • عند الحصول على المنحة يجب على الجمعية أو المسئول عن المشروع إعداد التقارير والاحتفاظ بالفواتير لضمان الالتزام بتنفيذ المشروع وعدم التلاعب

وبعد كل هذا العمل تواجه الجمعيات تعنت من قبل الجهات الحكومية مثل وزارة التضامن خاصة في مجالات مثل حقوق الإنسان والديمقراطية.

أضف إلى ذلك حاليا –بعد الثورة- أقل مدة لإنهاء إجراءات استقبال منحة خارجية هي ثلاث أشهر – مع العلم ان الموضوع كله متوقف على إمضاء الوزير! – هذا غير الجزء الذي يستقطع من المنحة للضرائب والسرقات!

وقد طالبت العديد من الجمعيات بضرورة تغيير القانون المنظم لعمل الجمعيات الأهلية في مصر، كما حاولت بعض الجمعيات التخلص من مثل هذا التعنت والوصاية عن طريق تسجيل الجمعية كشركة غير هادفة للربح.

لذلك من وجهة نظري إذا حصلت جمعية ما على منحة –من مصدر موثوق ومعلوم أهدافه- فهذا دليل التزامها وكفاءتها وبالتأكيد تضيف فائدة للمجتمع وخاصة الشباب، ليس خيانة أو عمالة كما يصور للكثيرين. كما يسهل مراقبة وراجعة مثل هذه المنح عن طريق التقارير التي تقوم معظم الجهات المانحة الكبرى بنشرها كاملة.

كما لا يمكنني اتهام مثل هذه الجمعيات لمحاولتها مساعدة المجتمع المصري عن أي طريق متاح خاصة بعد أن سد النظام السابق جميع طرق التنمية المجتمعية وأساء التعليم.

محمد المهدي

24-12-2011

ملاحظة:

– الموضوع ليس دفاع عن جهة معينة، فقط توضيح أردت مشاركته بعد ما كثر الكلام والاتهامات بدون أي دليل وبدون حتى نشر أي معلومات توضح ماذا يحدث في قطاع كبير من الجمعيات الأهلية والمنظمات الشبابية، كما كنت أحد المستفيدين من هذه المنح والمشاريع فقد أتيحت لي فرصة التدريب والسفر للعديد من الدول. وأستطيع أن أقر بأن مثل هذه المشاريع قد غيرت حياة الكثيرين.

– في بعض الأحيان تتحول المشروعات التنموية إلى ما يشبه الموضة تبعا لحجم وعدد فرص المنح المتاحة لأهداف معينة.

أسئلة محتاجة إجابات!!!

Posted: December 20, 2011 in thoughts

 

حتى علاء كان مفهم أهله انه بيروح المستشفى الميداني بتكليف من الكلية عشان يسبوه ينزل،، الله يرحمو!

في كاميرات في مجلس الشعب فين بقى فيديوهات هجوم الناس على المبنى؟؟؟ وليه ماطلعش لحد دلوقتي؟ مع العلم انها صورت الناس باليل وهما بيلفو سجاير وطلع الفيديو! يعني شغالة أهي وبتصور!

مين الناس اللي كانو فوق المبني؟ بحدفو طوب ومولتوف على المتظاهرين! مع العلم ان الجيش والشرطة منعوا الناس إنهم يدخلو المبنى؟

مين اللي طفي مجمع الكتب؟ ومين كان بينقذ الكتب؟؟؟

عرفت ان اللي جابوهم مقبوض عليهم وبيشهدو ضد المتظاهرين، طلعوا متلقنين بيكذبو؟ وأتقدم بلاغ ضدهم بالفعل؟

سمعت شهادة مدير المجمع العلمي ؟

لو أختك اتعاكست في الشارع هتقول هي اللي نزلت؟ إيه نزلها؟

لو أخوك أو واحد صاحبك ناس جم ضربوه وهو أعزل ولوحده هتعمل إيه؟

بذمتك شفت كمية العنف دي في تعامل جيش اسرائيل مع الفلسطينين؟

……

وآخر حاجة: إيه بقى انجازات المجلس العسكري في إدارته للفترة الانتقالية؟

 ممكن كل واحد يفكر بينه وبين نفسه في الاجابات، ولو وصلت لإجابات أكيد حاجات كتير هتوضح!

Men of Honor

Posted: September 20, 2011 in Uncategorized

the life journey

Honor is like a match: you can only use it once.

Marcel Pagnol (1895 – 1974)

Some men do realize they are made of honor; they don’t wait for people to tell them so, and they deal on that base.

They don’t have to say who they are, or use those shiny words; still people do treat them honorably.

They never over estimate their abilities and powers, neither underestimate them!

They make good friends, partners, or parents, still can’t survive alone!

Their values are their honor; noble, stable and respected at any circumstances.

They would do their best to help out; sometimes you even won’t know how or when! It is not about counting favors, they do it out of their feeling of “wageb”.

One word of thanks can be their prize rather than money.

Their natural enemies are made of lies! Sometimes they lose their fight, but they never lose their selves!

They certainly know well how to win, also they know how lose with honor!

You would feel honored to compete with them and you will for sure have to say hard luck to them because they deserve it. Others don’t deserve even your competition!

to be continued!

Meditation

Posted: May 11, 2011 in thoughts

Meditation

happy u let me in 🙂

Finding an inner peace is a shelter from such violently changing life, busy days and rapid rhythm of emotions we face each day.

I did meditation sessions many times before but the last few ones were different, it isn’t me alone anymore!

It became like being with her can really cure my soul, she can take off all worries weighting my houlders, and she is the only one I would let inside to explore and restore the pure state of such disturbed soul.

Yesterday I played that soft meditation album of Dan Gibson; producing natural sounds of water, waves, birds and trees. And I closed my eyes to hear the melody of her smile.

It was us alone, nobody watching except me. The night was enclosing the wide extended sea and its shore, in that magnificent majestic cloak. Sand particles were soft and cold, encouraging you to dip your toes inside and enjoy their tingling.

We were lying on our back, watching thousands of scattered shiny stars forming pearls decorating the night’s cloak. Big full moon can be seen between our flexed knees, lightening the waves that rush holding the moons messages towards our place. But they suddenly end up few yards from our feet sending the shy salutes in their last sparks of light, before going back into arms of its mother sea.

The only heard sounds are night’s holy music, giving you that shiver; the sea had something to say, some scary birds’ sounds, but all were covered by those sweet laughs and hmmmms.

We were happy, as if we managed to drop all the worries and fears into those waves withdrawn fast to the sea, now we feel the peace, no words needed but the look and smile that I slowly opened my eyes still having them.

A deep breath taken in then out, then eyes are closed again I guess I missed her presence already since I opened them.

This time we were on the same shore, but far away from the sand, we were sitting on this rock tacking advantage of that view of the full moon and its waves, but this time his messages had to be interrupted but the rock itself, 1 meter beneath our feet, we could hear its salutes in the drizzle that sometimes
manages to reach our legs.

It was cold up there, so she had my shirt on, and we were staying close with my arms around her shoulders. I was getting my warmth from her smile, and I wanted to stay more.

But it was raining now we went running through the rain, letting its droplets to wash out all the days’ worries and fears, then we went into the carefully arched trees entrance of our room.

I opened my eyes slowly; I took the mobile and dialed the number. It was her voice again, this time saying hello. My only words were I need you.

\

m. elmahdi 30.9.2010